Saturday, July 12, 2008

Of Bat People

We are peaceful folk. All we wish is to have a space in which to create our cartoon, free from distractions, and chaos. A place to call our own even though it may not be, and a freezer full of otter pops. We have been blessed, and have lived for many months off of the good-natured spirit of Amanda Knight in her namesake building, and she has come through for us many times granting us help when we ask for it. In the past we needed a piece of wood to prop up a dilapidated shelf and she provided us with a board already cut to the exact measurement. We found ourselves lacking a recording studio, and she gave us an old meat freezer that is void of echo, perfect for recording sessions. There are couches for naps, and an old rug to cover up our business when nature calls. So what could upset the harmony we have enjoyed with the ghost of Amanda Knight? Enter The Bat People.

For those of you who don't know about these horrible creatures, let me explain. Simply put, Bat People are jerks. There must be a more eloquent way to explain our distaste for the mischief-makers from above, but when emotions are involved it is hard to keep a level head. They have been our tormentors, and at times, our bully's. Close your eyes, and imagine how much you hate red-heads. Good, now imagine if those red-heads lived in the attic above you, unplugging your extension chords while listening to Klaus Nomi and Yanni. Yeah, I know, that's why we hate them. If ever we run into a snag it's because of the Bat People. When we stub our toes, it's Bat People. When our hot-n-ready pizzas go cold it's Bat People. And there is strong evidence suggesting that on our creatively unproductive days, it's due to their sonar laughs permeating our minds, turning our thoughts into pudding as they watch Mind of Mencia above us. They also have no taste in humor.

We have stretched forth the hand of Friendship (Friendship was the name of a Leper that used to hang with us) and left it at the base of their dwelling, but they wouldn't eat it. They're apparently food snobs too. We have tried the diplomatic route by fire-bombing their home but all they do is swear vengeance. So, we have decided to live best as we can, top-by-bottom, with our new neighbors, doing the best that we can to ignore them, but always steady and ready for a brawl with the winged-wankers from above.

1 comment:

The Angrybear said...

Joeseph, I had no idea you held such distaste for Red Heads...

Remember I know where you sleep.